Thursday, December 13, 2012

Wedding Business


As some of you know, I'm knee-deep in wedding planning. And oh what a ride it has been. We've come a long way from the first two extraordinarily rough months of planning to a state of steady decision making. We've got colors, we've got the big stuff booked (read: band, venue, rabbi, photog) and I've got the dress. I've been looking for inspiration everywhere and tomorrow I have some very exciting stuff to share so make sure you check in!

I can't reveal too much about our choices yet, simply because I want there to be an element of surprise for our guests. I will say that we're going with a romantic feel throughout the day with lots of personal touches that feel very "us." 

My dress is, in my opinion, very unique. I feel very French in it -- may sound odd but that's the feeling I got when I waltzed around the bridal boutique in it. I can share one little detail, my wedding shoes which arrived this week. In the words of Carrie Bradshaw, Hello Lovers.


I'm in a stage in life where a lot of dear friends of mine are also wedding planning and since I've found that it's not all puppies and sunshine here are a few of my hard-earned tips:


1. First and foremost set a hard and fast budget with room for a few emergencies/extras. Do not pick colors, do not pick location, do pass go, do not spend that $200 because you're probably going to need it. Seriously though, weddings are crazy expensive no matter how you slice 'em. A set budget will keep your spending in perspective. Money conversations are zero fun but the sooner they happen the sooner the fun starts.
Part two of this tip is do not look at anything outside your budget -- a dress, a venue, a band -- as a rule of thumb you will fall in love with what you can't have. It's just how the universe works.

2. Give yourself room to breathe. Take things in stride and remember two very important details: it's your wedding and it won't be perfect. It'll be amazing because it's your wedding but something will likely go awry -- that's the way of things. The best you can do is to go with your gut. Wear what you want. Decorate how you want. If something feels off, if looking at wedding magazines is making you more stressed than inspired, if you can't figure out how the heck all those other brides DIY the crap out of their day and still sleep at night -- that's fine. Walk away. Take a day off, you'll figure it out. Come back to it when it feels fun again. (A good checklist with a countdown by month will keep you from getting behind)

3. Choose your team wisely. Your wedding party will become your support system. You need to be able to count on them and you need to be as certain as possible that they won't stir the pot. I'm not sure what I'd do without my bridesmaids.

And my least favorite wedding tip of all time? "Hire a wedding planner." 
I've seen this tip countless times in several places and you know what? Wedding planners are expensive. Most brides cannot afford them. You'll be OK. I'd love to have a planner but it's not in the cards -- instead I did a ton of research and found a team who consults brides and helps them find a venue and vendors for FREE. You heard me F-R-E-E. They are paid by the venues -- like headhunters. If you live in NYC I highly recommend the ladies at Kool Events. They helped us nail down our venue and negotiate a great price.

Good luck future brides and remember to check back tomorrow for a special treat!

In the meantime if you have questions or want to chat about wedding topics just leave a comment!

2 comments:

  1. i'm new to your blog so congratulations on your engagement! and i love the shoes... i still love wearing my wedding shoes!

    two things i'd add - ask your friends what went wrong at their weddings. mine all had funny stories but they were about things that i'd never noticed, even though i was in the bridal party! that made me a lot less nervous about what would go wrong at ours... and when stuff did go wrong, i wasn't worried b/c i knew no one else would notice! AND determine what's important when you are spending money. budget is super important but you will still have to make really tough decisions and decide when to go over or not... so knowing a few things that are really important to you (your guest's comfort, ease of the day, food, alcohol, the photography, the dress, the decor, etc.)will help you to prioritize when you get further into planning and everything seems to be coming in over budget.

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    1. Really fantastic tips, Rita! Thank you so much!

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